Yep. I actually told my kid that when she was in public school.
And I’ve repeated that sentiment over and over again through the years.
I know…right now you must be shaking your head in disgust.
You wouldn’t be the first, and you certainly won’t be the last.
I don’t want my child to ever start trouble…but if anyone messes with her, I want her to be able to defend herself.
My friend told me a story about when her child was in public school.
She got called to the school when her daughter was put in “reassignment.” (That’s where they send the kids who misbehave, so they can think--and write--about what they did wrong.)
Evidently, her daughter was attacked by a kid in the playground. He pushed her up against a fence and had her by the throat.
She was able to get her hands on him, and pushed him off her.
And then she was sent to reassignment. (I think she was about seven at the time.)
The mom told the reassignment monitor, “Good…she did EXACTLY what I told her to do if she got bullied. Now I’m going to take her out for an ice cream.”
I could have stood up and applauded her.
That’s when I adopted my “Don’t start anything, but make sure if someone else starts, you FINISH” philosophy. I want Becca to be able to defend herself. If it comes down to putting her hands on somebody to accomplish it, well then so be it.
I know I’m going to piss off the pacifists out there. I won’t apologize.
But once again, before I get skewered. I’d expect Becca to use any kind of physical self-defense as a last resort. We always talk about “using your words” first. (And believe me, Becca has no trouble speaking up for herself.)
But when words don’t work, and if someone has you cornered, you do whatever you need to do to get out of the situation, safely.
Fortunately, she's never had to do it...and let's hope she never gets into a situation where she has to.